Why Did God Let This Happen To Me?

Our family has endured some hard times.

You may have had some hard times, too. You think to yourself, “Why did God let this happen to me? Why isn’t it any easier?”

I know I’ve had those thoughts.

If you were here with me, I would ask you out for coffee, and we would sit and chat with steaming porcelain mugs cradled in our hands. I would sip on a tall white mocha.

And this is what I would share with you:

We’ve hobbled through and carved a beautiful life together, one long day at a time.

It has been a journey of linking arms and putting one weary foot in front of the other.

Maybe you’re there now?

I remember our old gray Honda Prelude with 300,000 miles. It worked hard for us. Near the end, I would hop into the driver’s seat as my husband pushed it to start. We wondered if we’d ever have a more reliable car.

I remember being newly married and having a terrible allergic reaction to an injection. I had to take steroids for months and they made me moody, maybe even temperamental. I certainly wasn’t easy to live with. We wondered if this whole marriage thing was going to be a nightmare.

Related: Bible Verses to Strengthen Your Marriage

I remember struggling with infertility for years, wondering if I would ever hold a precious baby in my arms. Would we ever be blessed with a child?

I remember when my husband was out of work and on unemployment. We desperately tried to pare our budget down to the bare minimum so we could make ends meet. I cooked frugal, healthy meals; cut coupons; and leaned hard on our faith in God. Unexpected checks would show up in the mail. He always provided.

As I look back now, those years seem short. Time has flown by. The old Honda that we pushed to start is long gone, and a newer, more reliable car sits in its place. The marriage that could have been a nightmare flourished and grew into a miraculous answer to prayer. The years of infertility resulted in two beautiful boys who now call me mom.   The money struggles caused me to learn about saving, spending, and budgeting so our family could one day land in a better place: being debt-free.

Related: We’re Debt Free! Our Story of How We Paid Off Our House

Don’t be discouraged with where you’re at now, mama. There are better days ahead. God is faithful and just and merciful and true. He has not forsaken you.

He is preparing you.

Jesus spent thirty long years preparing for three powerful years of public ministry here on earth.   During those thirty years he grew in “wisdom and stature” (Luke 2:52). We can follow his example and use these dry, winter seasons to grow and learn.

We can choose to read inspiring books, take online courses, and find like-minded friends.

We can make a daily effort to bless someone with words of encouragement: another young mama, a hurting child, or a quiet, faithful widow in our church family.

We can grow deeper in our walk with Him. Worship more passionately.

We can continue to seek Him first, one morning at a time.

All of this life is but a moment in light of eternity, and He is gently getting us ready, drawing us near. Yes, it’s a broken world, and even our hearts are broken. He was broken when He was here, too. He suffered so He would understand our suffering, so we wouldn’t have to walk this road alone, so He could bring redemption and salvation and hope for what’s to come.

As the psalmist says in Psalm 34:17-18,

¹⁷ The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them;
    he delivers them from all their troubles.
¹⁸ The Lord is close to the brokenhearted
    and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

He loves you so much; not just your children, not just your friends…. YOU. Believe that He is for you. His promises are for you. He is close to you, even when you feel like He is far away. Walk confidently in this season and know that you can trust Him, even when it’s hard. Even when you don’t understand.

His plan for your future surpasses anything you could understand today.

He is always faithful.

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