Featured post by Mrs. Wanda Fielder
The sanctity and blessing of marriage is well established in the Bible for our example, and yet it does require an effort on one’s part to make it the beautiful union that God intended. It has been stated that good marriages, like strong steel, are always forged. It doesn’t happen by chance or accident, but it takes the special efforts of each partner to build a great marriage. Let me share with you the three c’s of a godly marriage.
1. Commitment
Commitment in marriage actually commences before the marriage ceremony at the time of the couple’s engagement where promises are made to become united in matrimony. Marriage customs during Bible times indicated that the engagement or betrothal commitment was nearly as binding as a marriage. Carrying this binding pledge into the marriage provides stability for whatever may be encountered. Too frequently marriage is entered on a trial basis lacking the commitment to each other that promises to weather the storms that might arise. However, before a commitment is made to each other, true success comes from making a personal commitment to God. That vital commitment becomes the strong foundation of a godly marriage.
The Blessing: The assurance of your companion’s loyalty and endurance through all circumstances
2. Communication
The lack of good communication can cause disastrous repercussions in a marriage. Although conversation plays a vital role in the love process, it is amazing to see how communication can diminish through the added pressures of day to day living. Purposefully keeping the line of respectful communication open and vibrant is a benefit to any marriage. Conversation is not necessarily communicating, so it is vital to convey heart thoughts and feelings to each other. Good communication is neither condescending nor sarcastic but consists of quality and respectful sharing. Amy Bellows, PH.D., proficiently shares, “Communication is the mortar that holds a relationship together – if it breaks down, the relationship will crumble.” By first communicating with our awesome Creator, it is much easier to be successful in communication with one’s companion.
The Blessing: Honesty in sharing and listening will be reciprocal
3. Contentment
I Timothy 6:6 can well be applicable to marriage where it states, “But godliness with contentment is great gain.” A covenant vow was made in our marriage that promised love through better or worse, sickness or health, richer or poorer, ‘til death do us part. By choosing contentment through all circumstances that may be encountered you are providing a firm foundation of stability that cannot be shaken by the winds of life. Contentment brings peace, and peace enhances love.
The Blessing: Happiness and satisfaction
Being married for forty-three years, to the same man, and still in love, perhaps gives me somewhat of a voice to be heard. Although blessed with a wonderful and lasting marriage, the success of our union is based upon these three c’s – commitment, communication and contentment, first of all to God and secondly to each other. The two go hand in hand.
Mrs. Wanda Fielder is a pastor's wife, published author, and conference speaker. She shares inspirational articles, recipes, ministry ideas and more at her site, Tea-Lightful Inspirations.
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also shared at {Titus2}sday, Women Living Well, and Raising Homemakers
Great Post! Nothing better than to see it tried and true by someone who’s been married to the same man for 43 years!
I agree, Heather!
We’ve only been married close to 6 yrs now, but the wisdom of all that is evident in our relationship. Thanks for the nice thoughts.
Thanks for sharing this succinct but excellent post! Although as a non-Christian religious woman (I am Jewish), I see some of the ‘doctrines of marriage’ differently to orthodox Christianity (mainly regarding wifely submission), I wholeheartedly agree with your sound advice. Even (or especially?) for us ‘egalitarians’, it is good to be intentional about our marriages and to strive to always show respect and consideration towards each other.
I liked the concept of the three c’s: when my husband and I dated, we were already talking marriage within three weeks! Having a strong sense of ‘covenant’ and awareness of ‘choice’ (in a positive sense of choosing intentionally for someone) really helped us. (Those are two more c’s for your list
).
Communication is key and I am a big believer of both confronting conflict issues AND reaffirming my spouse through loving communication – I write a lot of love-letters! But most important (though difficult) is contentment. We are influenced by a ‘Hollywood’ idea of romance that is often unrealistic. Realizing that I was not looking for Prince Charming, but for a good, honest, loving and spiritually/intellectually compatible man allowed me to see the potential in my husband when I met him. Of course, there is always a danger here as well: we shouldn’t ‘settle for less’ or, God forbid, stay in unhealthy relationships seeking to achieve ‘contentment’. But, for many (if not most), ‘healthy’ marriages based on love and respect, contentment is a good guideline to go by.
For those interested, I blogged about a similar topic a few weeks ago in my ’10 Ways to Make a Marriage Work’. Feel free to read if you’re interested. I always look forward to sharing thoughts and comments.
http://this-good-life.blogspot.com/2011/04/passover-ponderings.html
Thanks for sharing and blessings,
This Good Life
Oops, added to provide the CORRECT link to the Marriage post I referenced in my comment!
http://this-good-life.blogspot.com/2011/04/10-ways-to-make-your-marriage-work.html
Blessings,
This Good Life